I'll Tell You One Thing, My Ghost Ain't Gonna Be Haunting That Fucking Pool
Herr Guitar and I went to see Sonic Youth and Yeah Yeah Yeahs last Friday, at the McCarren Pool in Williamsburg. The bands were both amazing - Mark Ibold* from Pavement played bass for Sonic Youth. Kim looked great, though she seems to be taking dance lessons from her teenage daughter. Into her third song-and-twirl number, HG wondered aloud whether there is a Wisteria Lane where Kim and Thurston live. Still, there's no one cooler - except maybe Karen O, who is like a cross between Iggy Pop, Mick Jagger and Chrissy Hynde, and yet truly unique. She's an incredible singer and an amazing show-woman, using her lanky body to full effect while running around the stage in a ridiculous 80s-style shimmering poof dress. Awesome!
[HG will kill me if I don't mention that Mark Ibold once served us breakfast at Great Jones. At the show, he actually shouted: "That guy served me breakfast!" And when Thurston mentioned that Mark just moved to Brooklyn and Mark corrected him and said, "Queens" and Thurston said, "Somebody had to do it," HG yelled out "Jersey City!" I was appalled.]
Back to the 80s... That's not just a segue, it's a description of the crowd. Who knew that 1980s fashion was just back, plain and simple? Everyone in that pool but us, I guess, because I felt like I was not informed that the evening would involve costumes. At first, I thought the place was just filled with some of the local Polish girls, who always seemed to have a particularly 80s-yet-timeless style. One girl had a Jean Seburg-meets-Phoebe Cates haircut, black and red striped shirt, jeans that tapered at the ankle (into zippers? could that be possible?), ending in black Converse All Stars. I thought she either had the most calculated 1984 look I'd ever seen, or she was one of the teenagers who work at grocery store. (We always joked that The Donnas worked there - young Polish beauties with lots of unironic blue eye shadow.) But then I saw another big belt. Another tapered jean. Air Jordans! Brightly colored clutch purses. All stars all around. It was like an Ashlee Simpson video but with better music. And is it possible to be cool wearing a "Snakes on a Plane" t-shirt? I spied at least three different gentlemen that evening who must have though so.
It wasn't just the bad fashion that bothered me, it was the mass alterative sameness. Granted, Williamsburg is hipster Disneyland. It has been moving toward that for awhile, and this recent visit confirmed it. Even corporate America is paying attention. When HG stopped at a favorite cafe he was solicited by the makers of the Yaris car. On the way into the show, we got free Boost Mobile bags (I have no idea what Boost Mobile even does - but apparently a bag is necessary) from one cool-looking kid (when he said to HG, "Do you want a bag?," we thought we were being courted by a dealer, as is custom at a normal concert. Then he actually handed us a backpack. HG panicked, sure he was being set up or sold something he didn't want), and scratch off tickets for Best Buy from another. I never felt so commoditized. Can't you just hear the pitch? "They are hungry for a look that defines them, and they have lots of disposable income!" But when we entered and saw the vast convergence of alternatypes, I kind of lost it. I felt like I was at Urban Outfitters: The Concert.
Now to the subject of the pool. I lived in the neighborhood for almost 10 years and never realized the pool was there - I just assumed the structure housed a former napalm factory or some such - but I'd read a bit about it in preparation for this event. It's a giant pool that was built as a WPA project during the depression, it was closed down in the early 1970s, and was supposed to be reopened around 2000-01 before losing funding because of a priority shift after 9/11. I read an article by a guy who chatted up an old local at the Charleston who boasted that he helped keep the pool closed in the 70s (I can't find this article now, of course). The man and his neighbors motives were racist in nature, and therefore seemed not sensible. Then I read a seemingly newer local's complaint on Gothamist that Clear Channel was taking advantage - charging overpriced tickets to put on shows there that the residents would never benefit from, and blocking efforts to reopen it as a pool. Corporate bastards, I thought.
After spending time in the pool, I feel qualified to chime in. The pool is great - for seeing a show. As a swimming pool, it's a terrible, terrible idea. Anyone who thinks the city is going to bring that thing back is out of her mind. It's the size of four olympic-size pools! It can hold 6,000 people! I mean, at it's narrowest point, it's like 60 feet wide. If someone tried to swim from one side to the other - not a lap, but cutting across the pool, they'd have to be a great swimmer. If they're not, they'd drown about half way through and no one would even notice. This is a big pool, folks. You'd have to have 4000 lifeguards. I'd like to meet the real estate genius who decided that filling that thing with water would add value to the neighborhood. And as for the old-local racist? What liberal multi-culti in their right mind would take the opposing side? I've read that they plan to open a cafe and skate park to add interest. Read that last sentence again, and for the word "interest," substitute the word "urine." Did anyone consider the urine? Bleeeeeeeeeechk, hack, cough, wince, gurgle, gag! I can smell it already. I know New York has gotten too clean and healthy, but do we really need to promote a major health crisis? Plus, Brooklyn Vegan says a girl who drowned there haunts the place crying for help. I totally believe this, and by reopening the pool city officials would be all but asking for legions of additional drowned ghosts. (Yes, Legions of Additional Drowned Ghosts would be a great band name, but you can't have it.)
If you don't have their new albums, Rather Ripped (Sonic Youth) and Show Your Bones (YYYs), run and get them. Now. I'll wait.
[HG will kill me if I don't mention that Mark Ibold once served us breakfast at Great Jones. At the show, he actually shouted: "That guy served me breakfast!" And when Thurston mentioned that Mark just moved to Brooklyn and Mark corrected him and said, "Queens" and Thurston said, "Somebody had to do it," HG yelled out "Jersey City!" I was appalled.]
Back to the 80s... That's not just a segue, it's a description of the crowd. Who knew that 1980s fashion was just back, plain and simple? Everyone in that pool but us, I guess, because I felt like I was not informed that the evening would involve costumes. At first, I thought the place was just filled with some of the local Polish girls, who always seemed to have a particularly 80s-yet-timeless style. One girl had a Jean Seburg-meets-Phoebe Cates haircut, black and red striped shirt, jeans that tapered at the ankle (into zippers? could that be possible?), ending in black Converse All Stars. I thought she either had the most calculated 1984 look I'd ever seen, or she was one of the teenagers who work at grocery store. (We always joked that The Donnas worked there - young Polish beauties with lots of unironic blue eye shadow.) But then I saw another big belt. Another tapered jean. Air Jordans! Brightly colored clutch purses. All stars all around. It was like an Ashlee Simpson video but with better music. And is it possible to be cool wearing a "Snakes on a Plane" t-shirt? I spied at least three different gentlemen that evening who must have though so.
It wasn't just the bad fashion that bothered me, it was the mass alterative sameness. Granted, Williamsburg is hipster Disneyland. It has been moving toward that for awhile, and this recent visit confirmed it. Even corporate America is paying attention. When HG stopped at a favorite cafe he was solicited by the makers of the Yaris car. On the way into the show, we got free Boost Mobile bags (I have no idea what Boost Mobile even does - but apparently a bag is necessary) from one cool-looking kid (when he said to HG, "Do you want a bag?," we thought we were being courted by a dealer, as is custom at a normal concert. Then he actually handed us a backpack. HG panicked, sure he was being set up or sold something he didn't want), and scratch off tickets for Best Buy from another. I never felt so commoditized. Can't you just hear the pitch? "They are hungry for a look that defines them, and they have lots of disposable income!" But when we entered and saw the vast convergence of alternatypes, I kind of lost it. I felt like I was at Urban Outfitters: The Concert.
Now to the subject of the pool. I lived in the neighborhood for almost 10 years and never realized the pool was there - I just assumed the structure housed a former napalm factory or some such - but I'd read a bit about it in preparation for this event. It's a giant pool that was built as a WPA project during the depression, it was closed down in the early 1970s, and was supposed to be reopened around 2000-01 before losing funding because of a priority shift after 9/11. I read an article by a guy who chatted up an old local at the Charleston who boasted that he helped keep the pool closed in the 70s (I can't find this article now, of course). The man and his neighbors motives were racist in nature, and therefore seemed not sensible. Then I read a seemingly newer local's complaint on Gothamist that Clear Channel was taking advantage - charging overpriced tickets to put on shows there that the residents would never benefit from, and blocking efforts to reopen it as a pool. Corporate bastards, I thought.
After spending time in the pool, I feel qualified to chime in. The pool is great - for seeing a show. As a swimming pool, it's a terrible, terrible idea. Anyone who thinks the city is going to bring that thing back is out of her mind. It's the size of four olympic-size pools! It can hold 6,000 people! I mean, at it's narrowest point, it's like 60 feet wide. If someone tried to swim from one side to the other - not a lap, but cutting across the pool, they'd have to be a great swimmer. If they're not, they'd drown about half way through and no one would even notice. This is a big pool, folks. You'd have to have 4000 lifeguards. I'd like to meet the real estate genius who decided that filling that thing with water would add value to the neighborhood. And as for the old-local racist? What liberal multi-culti in their right mind would take the opposing side? I've read that they plan to open a cafe and skate park to add interest. Read that last sentence again, and for the word "interest," substitute the word "urine." Did anyone consider the urine? Bleeeeeeeeeechk, hack, cough, wince, gurgle, gag! I can smell it already. I know New York has gotten too clean and healthy, but do we really need to promote a major health crisis? Plus, Brooklyn Vegan says a girl who drowned there haunts the place crying for help. I totally believe this, and by reopening the pool city officials would be all but asking for legions of additional drowned ghosts. (Yes, Legions of Additional Drowned Ghosts would be a great band name, but you can't have it.)
If you don't have their new albums, Rather Ripped (Sonic Youth) and Show Your Bones (YYYs), run and get them. Now. I'll wait.
posted by j.m. at 4:13 PM
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