Finally, a Diagnosis!

Cookies from Starbucks Do Not Cure this Type of Depression. Believe Me.

Try as I might, I haven't been able to publish a post in weeks. I start. I write a few sentences. My mind wanders. I realize I have nothing to say about the given topic. I quit. I was going to write about all the bloggers who have been losing their jobs recently despite the fact that their blogs are completely innocuous and uninteresting. I was going to write about Rovegate and the new Supreme Court nominee and all of the really bad TV shows I've been watching this summer. I was going to write about how I am in the doldrums and everything seems like a hamster wheel of a routine. But I didn't. I just couldn't.

Now I know why. It's Blog Depression according to a pamphlet found on thenonist.com. Symptoms include loss of pleasure in the Internet, feelings of self loathing and dementia, and passive agressive moaning. That's so me!

I don't know if I can be cured, but now that I know what the problem is, maybe I can manage to eke out a rant about how my doctor is forcing me to consume mass quantities of vile, fattening Gatorade. It's a long story. Let's hope I can tell it one day.